THE SHOW MUST GO ON

It was a beautiful autumn morning. After breakfast I was ready to set off to work. Working hard was my motivation as usual, it made me feel good. I still carried on with my morning jogs which helped me start the day in a good mood.

I was allocated a company car the week I was promoted as a senior consultant. I never complained about using public transportation going to work but having a car was a big comfort. I’d also use it during the day on occasions visiting customers.  

I enjoyed listening to music while driving so I turned on the radio. 

"The show must go on

The show must go on 

I’ll face it with a grin

I’m never giving in

On with the show… "

What a wonderful song with full of  messages I thouht. "Yes, I said, we all need to keep on moving." Humming along with the song, I started thinking about her. We could keep on moving together in the same direction we both decided just recently. 

I was touched by the song and found myself humming it walking into my office. We could make our wedding dance with this song but it needed a lot of practicing. 

"Well, there is no free lunch. There is a price for everything." I said loudly, turning on my computer. A long, hard day was ahead of me as usual. It wasn’t the right time to daydream, I needed to get prepared to our weekly meeting. 

After a good, productive day at work, I was home just on time for dinner that night. Mom and my sisters and my brother were happy to see me and we had a very nice family dinner. This would happen rarely as I worked late in the evenings because I didn’t want to leave anything unfinished. 

"Everything delayed grows." my father said once and ever since I tried not to forget this.  

It was one of those nights when I went into deep thoughts again, remembering the song I listened to on the radio that morning; 

"Show must go on…"

There are roles given to us in life and there is a stage set up for us, a play ground,  where we display our roles accordingly. It’s what is expected from us actually, I thought.  

As children we were supposed to act like children, things were easier. The questions we got to answer were not so hard. The trick was to answer as many questions as possible to get stronger, my father told me. 

"Problems are there to make us stronger, don’t ignore them, try to answer them. You can get help from me or mom or people you trust. Transferring people’s experiences may be a lot of help." He used to say. 

As we grow older things get harder I supposed, our roles were more complicated. The problems we faced were more difficult and the correct answers needed a lot of thinking. The real answers were always there, not too far but kind of hidden a little bit. We had to put effort to find them, we were actually expected to do that basically.   

It was actually like in our school education years; in the primary level everthing was  easier. As we climbed up the stairs, like in high school and then university, we were expected to answer harder questions. If we answered them correctly, we would graduate and we were expected to take on another role basically. Questions would never end, only the topics changed. 

I managed my role as a son, a brother, an employee all at the same time on different play grounds. As long as I knew on which play ground I was in and which role I was supposed to act, everything went okay as it should. 

As a child I played my role not badly I thought. I was a good student, my teachers, mom and dad were great. I wasn’t a troublemaker, I knew my responsibilities. I always listened to my parents on how to behave while learning things. 

At school, I was a hard working student, had good relations and this hadn’t changed until now. As an employee I did a fine job I beleived as I was our boss’s favorite, my colleagues once told me.

It was now the time to establish my new role. After all those long sleepless nights, I found some real answers to the real questions I was looking for. It took me a while but this new role of mine needed a lot of thinking and researching. Talking to mom and to people I trusted and transferring their experiences really helped. 

Now I was ready to build my own family. While sipping my warm milk, I thought I was ready for my big role, feeling I wasn’t alone. It was good to feel not to be lonely when I was there alone with nobody around. 

Well, what will be, will be, I thought.  

“The show must go on.” I found myself saying while turning off the lights.