Not This Time…

 

NOT THIS TIME…

It was raining heavily when I woke up in the middle of the night. I couldn’t go back to sleep so I got up and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. 

I realized that I had a lot of things on my mind and especially the job interview scheduled for tomorrow. 

"Not this time! I can’t afford not to get the job." I found myself saying loudly. Not this time! 

I turned on the TV, the news channel, the main topic was world’s economy. 

"The course of the world economy is not bright at all," country’s leading economist was saying.

I couldn’t care less. I was interested about my own country’s economy right now. I turned another channel and there you go; when will the Fed rate decision be announced? Well I said, their economy also affects us, whether I like it or not so I started listening to the details.

I was the eldest child of the family, with two younger sisters and a brother who just turned four. My mother took care of us on her own after our father died three years ago. Now it was time for me to take my father’s place, take the responsibility of my family, think about my family’s economy.

My mom was having health problems recently and couldn’t work anymore as a tailor at a private company which she did for years and years. 

She retired and she could only do the house cleaning, cooking, the usual house work. 

My sisters were also very young, one of them 10, the other one 12 years old and they were going to school. They  could only help our mom at the weekends. My mom wouldn’t let them help most of the time and insist that they should study hard and finish their school with good grades. They spent their free time taking care of our little brother while mom was busy cooking or ironing or cleaning the house. 

Life was not easy, our economical situation was not so good but somehow we were managing things. 

My mom was getting money from the government as a widow and we were managing with the money my father left us but we couldn’t depend on it for long. 

We were living in a rented house with two bedrooms and with a tiny garden where we spent most of our time when it wasn’t raining or too cold. We were happy and thankful actually. Despite all the difficulties we had each other. 

I turned 19 a couple of months ago and started looking for a job. I could work and finish college at the same time, I had to anyway. I went to two job interviews for the past two month and both were negative. They were looking for “experienced people” to work, they said. 

Actually there was an economical crisis, people couldn’t find work, small companies were closing, people were without jobs. 

Rents in the city were rising extraordinarily. Everything was so expensive. Most families couldn’t pay their rents and had to leave their homes. They went back to their home towns and some had to go and live with their relatives. 

We faced with the same problem one morning. Our house owner came and said we should leave the house because he is selling it. Economically he was also having difficulties, he complained.

Rents were so high, it was impossible to find a new place to live in with a reasonable rent and we had no where to go. I had to work, no matter how l had to find a job. 

Not this time! I said again, finishing the water and going back to bed.  “I will get that job whatever it takes.” Thinking that “With every hardship there is ease.”